Stephen Gammell's World Of Horror

When I was in second grade, I was in a Barnes and Noble glancing through the children's books, when  something caught my eye. It was Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark, a collection of folklore retold by Alvin Schwartz with illustrations by Stephen Gammell. The stories themselves were classic campfire fluff, but what made them so creepy was the intense and disturbing artwork by Gammell. Needless to say I begged my parents to buy them for me. My friends and I were obsessed with these books and brought them to sleepovers, where we read them until the pages started to fall out. We even made our own ripoff versions, that we wrote and illustrated ourselves, photocopied, and then tried to sell to our classmates for a quarter a piece.

Since 1990 the American Library Association Office for Intellectual Freedom has received an enormous amount of complaints by parental groups and schools regarding The Scary Stories trilogy, which has made it the most challenged series of  children's books in the ALA's history. Parental groups succeeded in making sure that the Garbage Pail Kids TV show never aired in America, so why not go after a popular book series that they felt was too scary for kids.

So on the 30th anniversary of the original book's release, publisher Harper Collins finally caved in to the decades of complaints, and tried to tone down the classic series by replacing the frightening illustrations created by Gammell, with the dull and timid drawings of hack artist Brett Helquist. Now a generation of children, will never feel the full impact of these books, and another classic has been destroyed by politically correct lunatics.
                                                          
                                                                 Gammell VS. Helguist:

So to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Scary Stories books, I thought it would be a good idea to pay my respect to the amazing artwork of Stephen Gammell. Since we're all so familiar with the Scary Stories drawings, I thought it would be cool to show off some of Gammell's lesser known horror-based artwork from some of his rare and out of print books that I've been collecting over the years.
Enjoy!

 1. Ghosts by Seymour Simon (The Eerie Series) published in 1976 by J.B. Lippencott

6. Meet the Werewolf (The Eerie Series) by Georgess McHargue published in 1976

 3. Meet the Vampire (The Eerie Series) by Georgess McHargue published in 1979 by J.B. Lippencott

4. Leo Possessed by Dilys Owen, published in 1979 by Harcourt Brace Jovanovich Inc.

5. The Ghost of Tillie Jean Cassaway by Ellen Harvey published in 1978 by Four Winds Press

 6. Halloween Poems selected by Myra Cohn Livingston, published in 1989 by Holiday House.

 Even some of Stephen Gammell's "normal" children's books have that persona of surrealistic nightmares:

Gammell continues to illustrate children's books in  St.Paul. Minnesota, where he lives with his wife, Linda. His more recent works are in color and are much more playful than the illustrations from his black and white vine charcoal days.

Hopefully Harper Collins will re-release the original versions of the Scary Stories books, so that future generations of children can grow up with the same fantasy and intrigue that stimulated our imaginations when we were kids.

 
A Facebook page dedicated to that mission can be found here: BringBackTheScaryArt

There are a few other disturbingly ghoulish children's books that have (so far) remained untouched by censors - Check these out as well:

 If you're a fan of  Stephen Gammell's artwork, here are some other amazing books well worth checking out:

• 1975 Thunder at Gettysburg
• 1979 Stonewall
• 1982 Where the Buffaloes Begin - Caldecott Honor
• 1982 Wake Up, Bear...It's Christmas!
• 1982 The Story of Mr. and Mrs. Vinegar
• 1983 Git Along, Old Scudder
• 1984 Once Upon McDonald's Farm
• 1985 Thanksgiving Poems
• 1987 Old Henry
• 1988 Song and Dance Man -Caldecott Award
• 1989 Airmail to the Moon
• 1989 Terrible Things: An Allegory of the Holocaust
• 1989 Dancing Teepees: Poems of American Indian Youth
• 1993 Monster Mama
• 2000 Twig boy
• 2008 My Friend, the Starfinder

Unwatchable: 15 of the worst movies ever made

When most people think of bad movies, titles like Plan 9 from Outer Space or Transformers: Dark of the Moon come to mind. The list I'm presenting contains titles that make Troll 2 seem like solid gold in comparison. You see, I know bad movies as I've studied them for years, and even directed a few clunkers myself. This list contains movies that are so beyond terrible, that they offer nothing in the realm of either imagination or artistic expression.

NOTE: I've strayed away from listing any 50's and 60's schlock (Monster a Go-Go/Manos: The Hands of Fate) as well as mega- million dollar flops (Son of the Mask/Ghost Rider), because I think those titles warrant their own category for cinematic incompetence.

1. DEATH NURSE

First off, I can safely say that EVERYTHING directed by Nick Millard/Phillips should be on this list. Nick Millard has embarked on a cinematic journey of pure and utter trash since he discovered the invention of video tape. Death Nurse is a follow up to Crazy fat Ethel 2 which is a sequel to Criminally Insane, all of which should never have been made in the first place.

Some how, Criminally Insane gathered some kind of small cult following, enough so that Millard was able to make these awful sequels. Criminally Insane is at least shot on film, so it's not AS terrible as his camcorder features, but still pretty abysmal. All of  the movies in the "Crazy Fat Ethel/Death Nurse" series star Priscilla Alden, who is ether cannibalizing someone because she is hungry or chasing people around with knifes because she is crazy. It's hard to tell which is worse because Crazy Fat Ethel 2, Death Nurse and (God help us) Death Nurse 2 all seem to have all been shot on some deranged drug-induced weekend in Millard's apartment. I've honestly seen better videos shot for elementary school projects then anything that has protruded it's way from the "mind" of Nick Millard. His "movies" are so terrible, that you'd be better off watching a training video on how to install a printer than any one of his titles.

2. BILLY THE KID MEETS THE VAMPIRES

Not to be confused with Billy the Kid VS. Dracula, Billy the Kid Meets The Vampires is almost un-describable in it's incompetence. Director Steve Postal shelled out 11 of  SOV cheapies in the early 90's with titles like Curse of the House Surgeon and  Vampires Always Ring Twice, and somehow got himself a review in the Mick Martin and Marsha Porter movie guide, which is the only reason I ever knew that this waste of videotape even existed. Boy,  is this a dreadful experience to sit through. Not only was the film obviously edited on two VCR's, but it also runs a mind numbing 112 minutes, because Postal uses EVERY SINGLE TAKE. One right after the other as if you're watching a series of dailies that go on forever, so you hear every line about three or four times before it even continues to the next shot! The "story" revolves around Billy The Kid moving into a haunted house and eating hot dogs with ghosts while laughing at everything. Seriously... That's the whole movie. Everything about this piece of garbage is so terrible, that after awhile you find yourself laughing your way out of the torment that destroys your eyeballs on screen.

3. POCKET NINJAS

Robert Zdar has appeared in some ridiculous straight to video sludge (Frogtown 2), but why in the hell was he in this piece of shit? Pocket Ninjas not only boasts a ten minute long (!) opening credits sequence, but also some of the most dreadful martial arts ever captured on celluloid. The script feels like it was written by 5 year old kids suffering from severe head trauma, and you have to wonder who in their right mind actually put money into this? When you witness Z'dar playing patty cake with an arch villain while jumping up and down on a balloon, you'll know what I mean.

4.GANJASAURUS REX

If one ever need evidence that smoking pot turned you into a moron, here's your proof. Ganjasaurus Rex is without a doubt, the dumbest movie I've ever seen in my entire life. The "story" revolves around a weed smoking Godzilla wannabe who just can't wait to get high. Shot with a very crummy VHS camera, Ganjasaurus Rex has both terrible sound and picture quality as well as some of the dreariest actors to ever grace as TV screen. With no plot, no point, and the worst Godzilla rip-off to ever grace the screen, Ganja takes the cake.

5. MARINA MONSTER

It's hard to believe in this day and age, with the amount of tools available for aspiring filmmakers, that an abomination like Marina Monster can not only exist, but have worldwide distribution on DVD. I actually picked this up in a 99cent bin because I thought it would be a funny gag gift for a buddy's birthday. Then I watched it, and knew I could never give this to anyone under any circumstances. Marina Monster tries to be a horror-comedy, but fails at every conceivable level. From the horrid acting, terrible music, lousy camera work, and atrocious special effects, Marina Monster is a despicable assault on a viewer's intelligence. When the shark jumps from the water, opens his mouth and yells out, "I'm Hungry! Yum Yum!" you know you've just wasted 90 minutes of your life.

6. REDNECK ZOMBIES

As a kid I was tricked by this clever poster, which promised goofy zombie antics and hot naked bimbos. What I got however, was an hour and a half of SOV bullshit. With no nudity (except a bad close up of breasts on a TV screen) and few good death scenes, Redneck Zombies is just a boring and feeble attempt at a horror film. After some rednecks drink moonshine made from nuclear waste, they turn into zombies and have hallucinations that look like cheap public access effect filters. Originally this turd was released by Trans World Entertainment (Monster Dog) and I guess Troma (Toxic Avenger/Class of Nuke 'em High) just desperate for another movie about toxic waste, bought the rights and are now selling this worthless hunk of  trash on DVD.

7. MARTIANS GO HOME

Randy Quaid hasn't had too much luck lately and maybe it's because he's paying for his cinema sins. When Randy Quaid signed up to star in the absolutely terrible Martians Go Home, he should have known his career was in deep trouble. Martians go Home is based on the novel by Fredric Brown, and revolves around a group of  aliens (played by stand-up comics from the 80's) who try to be as annoying as possible to not only Quaid, but the audience watching this shit-fest as well. This is the most unfunny comedy I've ever had the displeasure of witnessing on the home video market. Not one of the jokes works, even in the slightest bit, within the 90 minute run time. This is just as depressing to watch as two other Quaid outings: National Lampoons Christmas Vacation 2 and The Adventures of Pluto Nash.

8. STOOGEMANIA

As a fan of the Three Stooges, I felt that this video release was the ultimate sacrilege. Director Chuck Workman and actor Josh Mostel should be ashamed of themselves for creating this mess. As an attempt to cash in on the new found Stooge popularity in the 80s' Workman assembled a "script" wrapped around public domain Stooge shorts in order to cash in on the craze. The result is an 83 minute waste of your life as Josh Mostel bumbles around playing a crazed Stooge fan, who hallucinates black and white footage of the Three Stooges at almost every turn. Awful!

9. F.A.R.T : THE MOVIE

Not to be confused with the 1991 Ray Etheridge version of the same name. The original F.A.R.T  is the most obnoxious attempt at a comedy ever. The whole film is centered around some asshole who farts all day to his wife's disapproval. That's it...the whole movie. This just goes on for almost a solid hour and a half, a guy farting while his wife holds her nose. And don't forget about the great music group "The Medicine Wheel Band" that plays a few tunes with titles like "Life Is A Gas" and "Blow it out of your behind..."   It takes a lot of people, money, and hard work to make a motion picture, so one has to wonder - how on earth does something this pathetic get made?

10. HOBGOBLINS

Gremlins spawned it's fair share of rip-offs: Critters, Ghoulies, Munchies, and Troll, but none of these (Not even Munchie Strikes back) can compare to the complete and total awfulness of Hobgoblins. Boring beyond comprehension and lacking any real interest, this movie has garnered a cult reputation because of it's showing on Mystery Science Theater 3000. For some insane reason, director Rick Sloane must be proud of this incompetent landfill, and has produced a sequel Hobgoblins 2! Jim Henson's worst nightmare indeed...

11. SATAN"S STORYBOOK

Don't quite know where to start with this one. It's supposed to be an anthology, but there's only two stories (I guess Satan got a little lazy) and it feels like a porno flick... with no porn. Satan himself sounds as if he has marbles in his mouth because the fake vampire teeth on the actor, make it nearly impossible to hear his dialogue (much like the ghouls in Curse of the Blue Lights) and Gary Bradner (author of The Howling) shows up as a clown who commits suicide...? Satan's Storybook has the feel of a high school play gone terribly wrong in every way possible. The company that released this travesty (Even Steven) made another equally horrible feature entitled Droid which was shot on location at a club called Filthy McNasty's.

12. OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES

If  Redneck Zombies is the stupidest zombie movie ever made then Oasis of the zombies is the dullest. When you have Nazi zombies in a horror film, you should be in for a good time (Shock Waves anyone?) but the folks behind this sorry sack, somehow managed to screw that up. Oasis of the Zombies is the cinematic equivalent of chewing tinfoil next to a loaded microwave. Watch this along with the equally atrocious Zombie's Lake and prepare for an early funeral.

13. DON'T GO IN THE WOODS...ALONE!

In the 80's after the success of Friday the 13th and Halloween, slasher films were being made pretty much every month by every amateur with a camera. Most of the 80's slashers were pretty terrible (Final Exam/Offerings), but Don't Go in the Woods is easily the worst of the lot. This film suffers from camera work so horrible, even Andy Milligan would be shouting for a re-take. The campers in this film are being stalked by a Rob Zombie look alike and spend most of their time repeating what might be the worst dialogue ever written onto a page. With lines like, "Get on out here you jerk you! Get outta here you pencil-necked geek!" The music score is also grating to the ear drums, and sounds as if it were composed by running rusted guitar strings over a trash can over and over again. Director James Byron obviously couldn't see the woods through the trees.

 14. TERROR IN THE SWAMP

Originally titled Nutriaman: The Copasaw Creature, Terror in The Swamp is a backyard bomb, and the worst "bigfoot" style creature feature to ever be made (and with movies like Snowbeast that's REALLY saying something). When the movie is shot in Louisiana with characters named T-Bob and Crazy Sally, I guess you know what you're in for. One of the most frustrating things is that we never get to see the monster, only a quick glimpse of a guy in a flea-bitten ape suit. At least the cheesy creature features of the 50's weren't ashamed of how terrible their monsters looked. I'd rather see something than NOTHING!

15.THE STUPIDS

Tom Arnold seemed to have quite a knack for appearing in some of the worst movies to be released in the theaters in the 90's. Films like Carpool and Big Bully were right up there with the likes of Pauly Shore fare, but none are as painful as The Stupids. Based on a series of books by Harry Allard, this filmed adaption centers around Stanley Stupid and his family of idiots as they try and find out who's stealing their trash and inadvertently get involved in a big government conspiracy. One has to wonder what caused a good director like John Landis (An American Werewolf in London/Blues Brothers) to get involved in this 25 million dollar mess? The Stupids is one of those movies that gives you restless leg syndrome within the first five minutes and epileptic seizures soon follow if you continue watching. Why New Line Cinema even bothered to re-release this heap of puke on DVD is beyond me. Can you imagine if Randy Quaid and Tom Arnold actually teamed up and made a movie together? Yikes!

Dishonorable Mentions:

1. MUTILATIONS

I have to admit, I really like this one. Sure it's got one of the worst covers I've ever seen on a VHS tape, and bad acting, horrible effects, and a lousy script, but it's also a laugh riot. There are times when you actually start to think that they made this movie terrible on purpose... But they were very serious when making this Oklahoma style monster flick about an alien invasion. Almost as funny as Troll 2, and for bad movie buffs it's a must see.

2. LITTLE LOST SEA SERPENT

From the twisted mind of Donald G. Jackson (Hell Comes To Frogtown/Rollerblade) comes this awful SOV messterpiece that will have you downing shots faster than you can say Superman 3.

Jackson was notorious during the video years for making some pretty rotten films, but they're brilliant compared to the miniDV features he did with martial artist Scott Shaw in the mid 90's.. Little Lost Sea Serpent is Jackson's worst and even has the atrocious Brad Bufanda from Pocket Ninjas in a starring role. Still, worth seeing for the awful puppet effects that will have you missing the Munchies in no time.

New Project from Razorwire Pictures

Teaser trailer to the upcoming Chris J. Miller project "The Second Self." A story about a filmmaker... A mysterious box... And a doppelganger.
Coming Soon

Vintage Slasher Games!

Vintage Slasher Games!

Nothing cements your icon status into pop culture like having your own video game, and only in the 80’s would it be possible that games based on R-rated horror film franchises would have made their way to the market place aimed at children. As we all know most of the video games based on popular franchises were indeed awful (Total Recall NES anyone?) but occasionally these games would be surprisingly fun.

FREDDY KRUEGER

Freddy has the distinction of having not only two vintage video games based on his character, but also two board games and his very own pinball machine (along with his own candy, toys, yo-yos, etc.).

 NES released the Nightmare On Elm Street video game in 1989, combining elements from both Nightmare on Elm Street 3 and 4,  in which the player fights his way through different parts of Elm Street (houses, junk yard, etc.). Along the way you fight Frankenstein, skeletons, ghosts and spiders, until you reach the end of the level and battle Freddy.

The NES game is actually pretty fun and was one of the few NES games with a four player mode. An interesting side note, is that there was a prototype for this game on the NES system, that was far different from the version released. As seen in this vintage NES flyer the game was originally intended for you to be Freddy killing off all the kids in the neighborhood.

This would have made for a much better game (who wouldn't want to play AS Freddy?) but I guess someone at Nintendo thought it would cause parents to go ballistic.

 
Then there’s the Commadore 64 game based on Nightmare on Elm Street 3 and like most Commodore games is insanely boring to play. It sticks close to the storyline of the third film, as you can choose Kincaid, Taryn, Kristen, Will, or Nancy as your player.

The player must locate keys to open doors and weapons are scattered about the levels or can be purchased from vending machines. Enemies are varied, from skeletons to wheelchairs that shoot grenades at you. The game has a faint reminiscence of the Oregon Trail, only with Freddy Krueger jumping out at you randomly. Freddy has made a recent appearance as a downloadable character for the 2011 Mortal Kombat video game.

JASON VOORHEES

Jason also has the distinction of having two vintage games under his belt, unfortunately, both are pretty atrocious. The Friday the 13th game for NES is interesting at first, but after awhile the music and repetition of game play grates on ones nerves. All you do is wonder around Crystal Lake trying to save kids from being slaughtered by Jason. Over and over and over again, until Jason finally kills you. Also without a game genie, you’ll likely never beat this game (or have the patience to finish it) and see this infamous final frame:

Why the game designers decided to give him a purple jumpsuit is beyond me. The version for the Commodore 64 however, is a thousand times worse. You run around Crystal Lake for hours trying to figure out who in the hell is Jason, and why he’s so hard to find. The problem is that Jason is a normal player moving around until he attacks or is attacked, so one can imagine the confusion and utter banality a game like this can induce in a person's psyche.

In 2008 a PC Friday the 13th 3D game was released to mixed reviews.

MICHAEL MYERS

In the 80’s Wizard Home Video (a VHS exploitation company) decided to get in on the exploding game market and release horror themed games for the Atari 2600. What seemed like a good idea, drew outrage from parental groups and stores that carried the games were forced to hide them in the back and the items were sold on request only.

The Halloween game is actually pretty decent for an Atari outing. Jamie Lee Curtis’ character runs around protecting the children from the evil Myers as the theme songs repeats itself adnauseam. Fun for a good five minutes (10 if you're drunk).

LEATHERFACE

Another release from Wizard was The Texas Chainsaw Massacre game, where you get to be chainsaw-wielding psychopath Leatherface! A great concept until you actually play the game, which becomes so tedious that after you’ve chainsawed through six or seven kids you simply stop caring about how high your score is. As a curiosity piece it kind of reminds me of the infamous Custard's Revenge game (a pornographic video game made for the Atari 2600).

PINHEAD

What? I don't remember a Hellraiser video game for NES? Well, that’s because it was never released. A British company called Color Dreams was in the process of creating a Hellraiser game using an improved version of the Wolfenstein 3D engine and a Z80 CPU for the NES. Because of the bigger chip for the cartridge the production costs went through the roof and the game was shelved.

It was going to be a first person shooter where you travel through the Hellraiser puzzle box . The goal was to solve the puzzle box and escape before the cenobites destroyed you. Seemed like it would have been a great game, and I think all us horror fans would have loved to have played it.

The age of the 8-bit slasher game is gone now, but it's interesting to look back on how fun it was while it lasted. Luckily for us 80's horror fans, an awesome new fan made game is in the process of being created for us to enjoy. It's called Terrordrome, and in it you get to pit your favorite horror icons against one another! It's due for release sometime in 2012. On that note - have a Happy New Year!

New DVD from Razorwire Pictures now available!

It's been a busy year for me and Razorwire Pictures. In between shooting various animated short films, I managed to sell two screenplays to the Gospel Music Network, win two Empixx awards, and worked on the sequel to The Toolbox Murders. So I've decided to release a new DVD of the various shorts that have been produced by Razorwire Pictures this past year-Enjoy!

Razorwire Pictures brings you the most innovative and creative collection of avant-garde animated shorts; using such techniques as stop motion animation, traditional 2d animation and CGI. This set includes:

CRAWFISH
A scientist and a Nazi drag queen explore the world of crawfish through a microscope.
* Winner 2011 Empixx Awards

ESKIMO
An insomniac dreams of becoming a super-hero built out of trash.

PORK 'N BEANS
Two drunkards discuss the meaning of life, while the world catches on fire around them.

THE LIGHTBULB FACTORY
Two extra-terrestrial aliens working at a lightbulb factory embark on many misadventures throughout the day.
*Winner 2011 Empixx Awards

WORKDAY
A day in the life of a creature working inside of a circuit board.

SUSHI 3
Five stop motion tales revolving around; a gargoyle, a duck on a bike, Pinocchio's resurrection, a dancing elephant, and a sea of worms round out the third and final chapter in the award winning SUSHI series.

Bonus Features:
Frankenstein Goes To Camp
Fantastic Explorations: The Journey To Mongo Planet
electroFiend's Music Video
Krzysztof Muller Music Video
Trailers

Available exclusively at Amazon.com