There's a lot of movies out there that have simply vanished throughout time. Usually when this happens it's because the movie is so awful that no one wants to remember it's existence. Sometimes, however, you'll find a hidden gem on a VHS tape shoved away in some bleak corner inside a thrift shop.
Here are ten examples of films that I feel deserve a little more recognition.
1. THE QUEST (a.k.a Frog Dreaming/The Go-Kids)
At the height of Henry Thomas' ET fame, he starred in this Australian feature from Director Brian Trenchard-Smith (Dead-End Drive Inn/Night of the Demons 2). The Quest is a touching coming of age film, about a young boy searching for the truth about a lake monster known as Donkegin, a creature birthed from Aboriginal legend. He and his summer pals try to find out what's really lurking underneath the waters at Devil's Knob national park. Like most Australian flicks The Quest is extremely well-made, John R. McLean's cinematography is breathtaking, and the music score by Brian May (Road Warrior/Freddy's Dead) is haunting in it's rich composition. This is a film well-worth searching for on VHS as it is currently not on DVD.
2. EYES OF FIRE
Eyes of Fire is a really bizarre ghost story that has many surrealistic elements to it. The plot concerns an adulterous preacher leading his followers into an isolated wilderness that is inhabited by evil spirits and a tree witch. The film takes place during the late 1700's and this gives the movie a kind of folklore/campfire feel to it. The score by Brad Fidel (Terminator 1&2) is eerie and unnerving and the strange optical effects surrounding the visuals gives the movie it's own unique style. Eyes of Fire was unofficially released on dvd in Portugal, but that version is long out of print. It's a shame that the director Avery Crounse, has made nothing this good since. His only other two features were the lousy Invisible Kid and the soap opera drama Sister Island. I guess he's just one of those one-hit wonder directors like Kevin Smith (Clerks-Let's be honest, he's never made another good movie).
3. BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS
I know what your all thinking, how on earth can I like this film? It tanked in the box office, Vonnegut disowned it and the critics hated it. Well, that's all fine and dandy, but in reality, this is a quite fascinating feature. Vonnegut is virtually unfilmable to begin with, but I really felt that this film did something different than the book, but in a good way. The madness that permeates this motion picture is truly unstoppable. If you ever want to see Bruce Willis at his most intense, or have a dying wish to watch Nick Nolte in drag-then this is the film for you! With it's awkward editing and drug-like visuals Breakfast of Champions reminds me of a cross between Natural Born Killers and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.
4. DR. CALIGARI
Porn director Stephen Sayadian (Cafe Flesh/Nightdreams) made his first "mainstream" film with this bizarre sequel to the silent classic The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari. The film works well with it's low budget and scarce set design, creating a truly oddball universe for one to dive into, reminding one of Richard Elfman's Forbidden Zone. Written by Jerry Stahl (Alf) during one of his heroin-induced rampages.
5. VOYAGE OF THE ROCK ALIENS
The only way to really describe Voyage of the Rock Aliens is that it's like being injected with the 1980's. Every scene, character, and costume just bleeds the era. Voyage is one of the most ridiculous and outrages musicals ever made. It has psycho's with chainsaws, beach party nonsense, a giant orange sea monster, a battle of the bands, and of course goofy Devo-style aliens with synthesizers. I think my favorite part of the film was watching Craig Sheffer (Nightbreed/Hellraiser: Inferno) dance around with cougars and female dancers dressed up likerejects from Cats, while singing about "The Nature of the Beast." I actually spent 50 dollars on the out of print soundtrack featuring Pia Zadora and Rhema (because the songs ARE that amazing). If you liked Shock Treatment (the much better sequel to Rocky Horror), then you'll love Voyage of the Rock Aliens.
6. THE LOST TRIBE
A strange movie from New Zealand in which an anthropologist goes missing while searching for a lost tribe of Maori. His twin brother goes searching for him and finds himself wrapped inside a vortex of supernatural mystery. The movie is rich in atmosphere and contains a creepy feel throughout. Director John Laing (who went on to helm Power Rangers episodes) creates an unusual suspense/thriller that is not to be missed (if one can find a copy).
7. SIMPLE MEN
Simple Men is director Hal Harlty's best film. All of the director's trademarks are present; awkward silences, cyclical dialogues, and characters that act like they just got out of a mental institution. While Hartley's other films like Amateur and Trust were great movies, Simple Men is an extraordinary film. The plot concerns two brothers; one that's a con artist, the other a college kid, searching for their revolutionary father who's been missing for twenty years. The performances by the leading actors are quite mesmerizing, with Martin Donovan (Saved) stealing the show as the eccentric fisherman, Martin.
8. PARENTS
Who would have known that mild-mannered actor Bob Balaban (A Mighty Wind/Altered States) would have such a twisted mind as a director, as Parents is truly one of the most demented horror-comedies I've ever seen. Young Micheal believes that his parents have been cannibalizing the neighbors and seeks help from his school counselor, who thinks he's suffering from a bi-polar disorder. The film has kind of an Eraserhead feel to it with its episodic structure and nightmarish imagery, and is a must-see for fans of the "cannibal" sub-genre.
9. MIKEY
Forget about The Bad Seed, The Good Son and Orphan-Mikey is one depraved little monster! In the first ten minutes of the movie, Mikey, played by Brian Bonsell (Family Ties/Blank Check) drowns his infant sister in a swimming pool, electrocutes his stepmother in the bathtub and beats his father to death with a baseball bat (and those are some of the tamer crimes he commits throughout this film). While not necessarily a well made movie-the sheer nastiness and violence makes it easily the most outrages of the "Killer Children' genre.
10. NIGHTKILLER (a.k.a. Non Aprite Quella Porta 3)
When the Texas Chainsaw Massacre was released in Italy they changed the title to Non Aprite Quella Porta (Don't Open That Door!). So after the success of the second installment in the Chainsaw series, Claudio Fragasso (Troll 2/Monster Dog) decided to cash in on the franchise by making an unofficial sequel (a year or so later he did the same thing with the Evil Dead ripoff La Casa 5). Although the movie has nothing even remotely in common with the Chainsaw films, It does manage to rip off Freddy Krueger, as the Nightkiller also has a glove with blades on the trips that he uses to disembowel his victims. Like all of Fragasso's films, Nightkiller is filled with the most hilarious, over the top dialogue you can ever imagine (it's as if Ed Wood returned from the grave to write more scripts). Nightkiller was never released in the US, so locating a copy is difficult to say the least. A few bootleg sites online carry the title, and I'm sure with the popularity of Troll 2, it'll only be a matter of time before this lost classic appears on DVD.
Honorable mention: THE LIFT
What can I say? It's a Dutch horror film about a killer elevator! Dick Maas not only directed the film, but also composed the awesome Moog inspired soundtrack (some of the tracks were used by Claudio Fragasso for his film Monster Dog). Maas remade the film as The Shaft in 2001.
There was a time (believe it or not) when computer generated imagery showed great promise in the world of filmmaking. When artists first started making CGI short films, there was a wide array of abstract possibility.
This short from Apollo computers shows a dreamlike reality, with awesome texture and amazing visuals. I remember when the video compilation Beyond the Mind's Eye first came out and was blown away by the psychedelic kaleidoscope of imagery and eye candy.
In the early days there was an organic quality to CGI that was both interesting and impressive.
When Tron firstopened in 1982, it created a primitive but captivating world set inside a computer generated universe. There was something so bizarre and interesting to the look and feel of the film that set new standards for cinema.
As time went on and graphics became more "lifelike" you started to see a decline in the more abstract and surreal imagery, and the movement towards photorealism started to take hold.
By the time that movies like Star wars: the Phantom Menace, and Final Fantasy came out, movies were using CGI for pretty much everything no matter how tacky and cheap it looked. 2d animation had also been replaced in favor of CGI and a string of really bad kid's films began showing up in theaters everywhere.
The only studio that I believe has managed to really make good CG animated features has been Pixar studios. The quality of their animation is excellent, but what really makes their movies a joy to watch, is the fact that their stories are always very well-written and filled with memorable characters.
Nowadays, the point of CGI is to try and recreate reality as closely as possible, which in my opinion is such a boring waste of a great tool. It's a shame that CGI has replaced everything; Sets, make-up, costumes, creature effects, pyrotechnics, props, and even actors.
Although CGI has great potential for animation, it just doesn't look remotely real or lifelike and has a weird sharpness to it that just looks phony and two dimensional. CGI has now become a tool for lazy and unimaginative filmmakers, and has pretty much destroyed media in general.
Good old-fashioned prosthetics can never be replaced by computers- just look at the photo underneath:
This is a still from the 1991 David Cronenberg film Naked Lunch. The mugwump creature designed by Chris Walas has a so much depth, texture, and detail to it, and it's just impossible to recreate this with a computer program.
Just compare the mugwump to one of the CGI monstrosities from the film Avatar, and one can really see just how flat and two dimensional these photorealistic characters really are. I guess that didn't stop audiences from eating up the hype surrounding Avatar and flocking to the theaters to see what is basically a CGI version of CaptainPlanet and the Planeteers.
This is unfortunate, as CGI has many great things to offer, but only when used in the proper context. If you're going to make a film you need REAL things for the actors to interact with, so that the audience will believe that it's really there. Just note the difference in these two clips.
The first is a clip from the brilliant children's film The Neverending Story, which was made before CGI took over the industry. Take a look at how realistic everything looks- there is nothing phony or cheesy looking about this sequence.
And now take a look at a scene of Jar Jar Binks from one of the new Star Wars films. Notice how goofy the movements are, and how the interaction with the actors is unconvincing and flat.
Now, on a final note, observe Rob Bottin's excellent make-up for the swamp witch from the film Legend with the computer generated Gollum from The Lord of the Rings. When you compare the two, you can really see just how pathetic this so called photorealistic junk really is.
Sure those graphics might look fine for a video game, but as a main character in a feature film? My only hope is that one day CGI will return to it's abstract and surreal roots, and people will once again rely on practical effects work and real sets instead of green-screened nonsense. If this happens, maybe we will see much more interesting motion pictures in the future of cinema.
If you grew up in the late 80's early 90's, you would have been fortunate enough to have owned or seen at some point, one of those cheap dollar VHS tapes, with a mangled version of your favorite cartoon character stamped all over it. These tapes were usually a half hour long, and contained cartoons that had fallen into the public domain. After re-visiting some of these tapes, I'm shocked at how crudely drawn the covers are. I find myself amazed that these things actually made it into super markets and video stores across the nation. These drawings are just plain awful, like a first grader drew it in crayon after getting a concussion.
Hard to believe that this blackface cartoon was released for kids in the 80's.
This must have been when Daffy Duck was on meth..
Is Porky Pig robbing the train?
Words can't even describe this one...
I just can't stop laughing at how atrocious these are...
It's quite interesting to note that a number of 80's horror and sci-fi films became obsessed with this "sky motif" where faces seem to float in the atmosphere for no apparent reason. It was kind of a cool trend, and some amazing artwork came out of it...
Bizarre Cartoons is a compilation of surreal, animated short films. The mixed media styles include: Stop-motion, cell animation, and CGI. This fantastic collection includes:
CHICAGO DRACULA
The city of Chicago is blown into orbit by Turkish terrorists and it's up to a goofy vampire to save the day.
SUSHI
A compilation of five stop motion vignettes, revolving around rubber dolls, alien beings, and a trip to the mummy's tomb.
HUMAN EXPERIMENTZ
In a post- apocalyptic future, a stranger in a gas mask must rescue a child from the clutches of a mad scientist.
SUSHI 2
Award-winning* follow-up compilation of three more stop-motion tales, involving a refrigerated nightmare, a flesh-eating pig, and a business man's trip to a mental hospital.
*Winner 2010 Pixie Awards; for excellence in stop-motion animation.
WHY NOT?
A young man is having relationship troubles with a zombie. Can the spirit of a woman inside his heating system save his life?
This compilation is a real treat for fans of strange animation. The DVD is also packed with bonus features including an Expansion Unit music video.
" Compelling Visuals; powerful work."
-The American Pixel Academy
WARNING: CONTAINS ADULT SUBJECT MATTER-NOT SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN! BUY IT HERE!
Chris J. Miller Presents: The Mondo Splatter Collection
The Mondo Splatter Collection contains three full length horror flicks on one blood-soaked DVD.
CARRION is about an alcoholic detective thrown into a weird vortex of the occult, as he investigates a sinister church controlled by the vicious black pope. Watch in horror, as the detective tries to stop virgin sacrifices, lunatic lesbians, and shape-shifting monsters. OCTOBER NIGHTMARE is a horror anthology consisting of four diabolical tales to chill your bones. These sadistic stories are told in horrific fashion by a psychopathic clown. Necrophilia, cannibal orgies, Nazi experiments and zombie massacres are just a few of the creepy delights waiting for you. MARBLEHEAD is about a young man tortured by his demon-possessed wife and a drug crazed golem. Witness the battle of the century as God and Satan duke it out for the souls of the innocent. This DVD is a must have for fans of extreme horror.
WARNING: THIS DVD IS RECOMMENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.BUY IT HERE!
